Attend any milonga – a tango social dance – and talk to some milongueros about their dance, the Argentine tango. Chances are at least one of them, probably more, will speak of it as an addiction (“a good addiction” of course); the milonguero will also likely correct you on your blasé use of the word  ‘dance’ because tango, you see, is not so much a dance as it is a way of life. To an outsider this solemn claim to tango’s habit-forming power might seem an amusing and drama-queenish overstatement; it does, at least, until you realize one evening that you have joined the ranks of the afflicted.

Next month, on September 4, I will give a rookie addict’s account of Argentine tango. Until then, I offer a YouTube compilation of video I shot on July 24 at the NYC Tango Festival’s closing ball (which is where I also took these four photos of Alice in Tangoland) and a line from Lewis Carroll’s song “Lobster Quadrille,” sung by the Mock Turtle as he circles in dance with the Gryphon: “Will you, won’t you, will you, won’t you, will you join the dance?”

www.youtube.com/watch?v=2nzTBQ3NxlA

It’s been exactly one year to date since the launch of Fourth Fiction, the blog-based reality show I hosted on my website. Ever since FF ended in December, I’ve been contemplating the next Fourth Night project, which will be more journalistic in nature. Yesterday, while swimming across Walden Pond with some friends, one of them, Sancho, asked me when this next undertaking would begin. It was the most essential question after “what is it?” and yet I had no ready answer. I originally intended to start this summer, then pushed it back to fall, then to winter, and so on; Fourth Fiction-related work was spilling over longer than I expected (still spilling) and the project required a minimum of funds that I didn’t have. But legitimate reasons aside, I realized that if I didn’t nail down a launch date I’d become like the smoker who’s been claiming for years that he’ll quit “soon.”

You don’t have to frequent this website to figure out that the fourth of each month is a big day for me. And of the twelve, July 4 is the biggest. So I decided right then, in the middle of Walden pond (which apparently 150 years on remains a fine place for introspection and resolve) that the project would begin next July 4. It may be a year away, but time has a tendency of getting away from me; even with this window, I have no doubt that by next summer I’ll be balls-to-the-wall, cursing the Way Too Soon launch date, just like I was doing last summer.

I shared my decision with Sancho (who only sighed and wrily pointed out that I’ve straightjacketed my life into a self-created horoscope). And, taking cue from my first paragraph, I am now announcing it to all of you. I hereby pledge that [title TBA] will launch on July 4, 2011. If I fail, I lack conviction. But I’m confident my ego & pride will stand me in good stead. They haven’t failed me yet.

*NOTE: I’m returning to my pre-May 2009 schedule of posting monthly every 4^th (this means no more 14^th or 24^th posts).

The following footage was filmed over New Year’s in coastal Maine, primarily Monhegan Island, but also Port Clyde and Thomaston (the filming there coming on the tail end of a night at Billy’s Tavern, which explains any slurring in the second to last video clip). The video mostly consists of seas, snowfall, granite, evergreens, lobsterboats and (+/- plow) trucks, the aggregate of which comprises something essential about Maine that demographics and other state statistics fail to account for, something that anyone who’s formerly lived in Maine always misses. It’s why even the most jaded ex-residents of Maine, except perhaps for the nouveau riche variety who’ve embraced parochial urbanism, upon crossing New Hampshire’s Memorial Bridge and reading the words ‘The Way Life Should Be’ on the big blue Welcome to Maine sign, will nod in agreement rather than glance shotgun and snigger.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=k8rr1TU_M6Q

PART I

www.youtube.com/watch?v=wF80r5DIg5k

PART II

www.youtube.com/watch?v=pJqO7gHjFy0

I thought I’d do the same and share the link. After all the recent Decade-in-Reviews and reflections on the so-called aughts or naughts or naughties or naughty aughties or, to use the most inspired contender for the title, the ohs, consider it as an oblique retrospective on Fourth Fiction, which also closed with the decade (coincidentally, “Mind Games” first aired on December 4th). You can listen to the episode HERE. It’s worth the hour.

For a political and less sympathetic take on the same subject, read the December 19th New York Times OpEd by Frank Rich, Tiger Woods: Person of the Year.

Upon going through my Fourth Fiction video footage over the last half year, I concluded it’s hopeless separating the Extras from the Bloopers so a combined “Bloopers and Outtakes” Video is coming on January 24th.

“Another experimental form in which [Joyce’s] literary urge took … consisted in the noting of what he called ‘epiphanies’; – manifestations or revelations.  Jim always had a contempt for secrecy, and these notes were in the beginning ironical observations of slips, and little errors and gestures – mere straws in the wind – by which people betrayed the very things they were most careful to conceal.”
-Stanislaus Joyce writing about his brother James.

“Wherefore are these things hid? wherefore have these gifts a curtain before ‘em? are they like to take dust, like Mistress Mall’s picture? […] Is it a world to hide virtues in?”
—Twelfth Night, Shakespeare

“On the Twelfth Day of Christmas my true love gave to me…”
—“Twelve Days of Christmas” carol

I originally intended to post a Fourth Fiction “Outtakes” video today. But no longer under the duress of the Fourth Fiction timetable, I reverted during the final fortnight of 2009 to that luxurious state of languid, unhurried contemplation that goes by the ungenerous name ‘idleness.’ During this delicious spell of glorified vegetation, I realized not only that I’d be unable to finish the video by January 4^th (the more correct word, I now know, is ‘start’) but also that the material warrants two videos: an Extras (unused footage) video, slotted for January 14^th post, and a Bloopers video, relegated to a distant January 24^th [out]post. In short, I’m doing my best to mothball any substantive writing. An opportunity for idleness is like bearing the Olympic torch: once it’s been handed to you, just give your thanks and run with it.

Those who’ve glanced at the COCO 12 post in the last ten days know that the second part has been password-protected. For the password, you must follow the directions in the README file from COCO 12 (Part I). Many, possibly most, readers followed the cipher and decoded a message, but my guess is no one took Tess up on her hintness and double hintness in part II of COCO 12 and embarked upon any other cryptographic hunts.

There are twelve more messages. Just the mention that more exist should be clue enough to find the rest, or at least all but one of them. Anyone who can decode the Round 1 message, can decode the following eleven. Now that I’ve arranged the posts chronologically in Fourth Fiction: The Complete Season, the only thing that should impede a swift decryption is a slow Internet connection or an aversion to word games.

As for the twelfth message, it’s wholly within COCO 12 (Part II). Just apply what you know. Fido can’t help you dig up the bone, but he has the answer key, so you can corroborate your findings with him (*hintness*, as Tess would say).

In certain branches of Christianity, Twelfth Night is a festival concluding the Twelve Days of Christmas and heralding the Epiphany (yet another Christian feast day celebrated on January 6^th that commemorates, for Western Christians, the manifestation of Jesus to the Gentiles through the visitation of the three Magi; for Eastern Christians, the revelation of God to man through the baptism of Jesus in the river Jordan; and for Joycean secularists, the sudden revelation one experiences upon pressing one’s spouse for details about a previous lover). According to the Encyclopedia of Superstitions, “[o]f late years” (a phrase that should always be read with an eye on the date of utterance: in this case, 1948, the book’s publication date) a belief arose that it was unlucky to leave tree decorations hanging after Epiphany Eve on January 5^th.

Since today (for I have crossed midnight and am now in the early morning hours of the 5^th) is the Twelfth Day of Christmas and tonight the Twelfth Night, this seems as good a time as any to allude to the Twelve Fourth Fiction Cryptograms of Christmas. Not to be superstitious or anything (it’s a rule of vapid expressions that one must always add “or anything” after “Not to be [adjective-of-choice])” but I wouldn’t want to jinx myself by leaving any chintzy Fourth Fiction decorations hanging around. For those put off by the Christian symbolism, just view this as some light cryptographic entertainment, which when decoded (and the only cipher you need for this is what Hemingway called a built-in bullshit detector) translates to ‘cheapest way for Fourth Night to buy another Ten Days of Idleness.’

What follows is Fourth Fiction in its entirety* from Round 1 to Round 12, which features the winning post. (To read the contestants’ writings from the pre-competition month on Twitter, scroll to the bottom of this page. Links to the polls are also listed at the end.)

*The links below don’t refer to contestants by their names but rather by numbers corresponding to the order of posting. The first writer to post in a round is referred to as “Contestant 1,” the second “Contestant 2,” etc, such that one number isn’t consistently assigned to any particular writer.

Round 1 Video – “Fire“

Write the opening sentence of your novella.

Contestant 1
Contestant 2
Contestant 3
Contestant 4
Contestant 5
Host
Contestant 6
Contestant 7
Contestant 8
Contestant 9
Contestant 10
Contestant 11
Contestant 12

Round 2 Video – “Canoeing”

Write your opening paragraph. It should be about interactions over the web. (300 words)

Eliminated Contestant’s Farewell
Contestant 1
Contestant 2
Contestant 3
Contestant 4
Contestant 5
Contestant 6
Contestant 7
Contestant 8
Contestant 9
Contestant 10
Contestant 11

Round 3 Video – “Speakers’ Corner”

Incorporate the death of a dog into your next passage. (400 words)

Eliminated Contestant’s Farewell
Contestant 1
Contestant 2
Contestant 3
Contestant 4
Contestant 5
Contestant 6
Contestant 7
Contestant 8
Contestant 9
Contestant 10

Round 4 Video – “US Open (Tennis)”

Weave an element of Fyor’s story into your passage. (450 words)

Contestant 1
Contestant 2
Contestant 3
Contestant 4
Contestant 5
Contestant 6
Contestant 7
Contestant 8
Contestant 9

Round 5 Video – “Poker and Magic”

Incorporate this image into your next passage. (500 words)

Eliminated Contestant’s Farewell
Contestant 1
Contestant 2
Contestant 3
Contestant 4
Contestant 5
Contestant 6
Contestant 7
Contestant 8

Round 6 Video – “Lebowski Fest”

Incorporate a White Russian and the words “over the line” into your next passage. (500 words)

Contestant 1
Contestant 2
Contestant 3
Contestant 4
Contestant 5
Contestant 6
Contestant 7
Eliminated Contestant’s Farewell

Round 7 Video – “Blessing of the Animals”

The Round 7 challenge is different for each contestant. See video for details. (600 words)

Eliminated Contestant’s Farewell
Contestant 1
Contestant 2
Contestant 3
Contestant 4
Contestant 5
Contestant 6

Round 8 Video – “Frogs and Torture”

The readers assigned the Round 8 challenges. See this post for details. (600 words)

Contestant 1
Contestant 2
Contestant 3
Contestant 4
Contestant 5
Eliminated Contestant’s Farewell

Round 9 Video – “Biking and the City”

1) Incorporate a hoax; 2) Incorporate a revelation; 3) Incorporate the number four; 4) Incorporate Stephen Colbert. (444 words)

Eliminated Contestant’s Farewell
Contestant 1
Contestant 2
Contestant 3
Contestant 4

Round 10 Video – “Marathon and Masquerade”

Kill off one of your characters (1200 words)

Eliminated Contestant’s Farewell
Contestant 1
Contestant 2
Contestant 3

Round 11 Video – “The Video Challenge”

Put your main character in danger in a new and hostile environment. There should be a struggle for survival through which new aspects of his or her personality are revealed (1500 words).

Contestant 1
Contestant 2
Eliminated Contestant’s Farewell

Round 12 Video* – “Tournament Final”

*I asked commenters to send a video or photo of themselves for inclusion in this YouTube. Also, there was a change in the season finale timetable.

Assign the challenge to yourself. It should be the most challenging one of them all (no word limit).

Eliminated Contestant’s Farewell

VIDEO: Stephen Fry Congratulates the Fourth Fiction Winner

FOURTH FICTION FINALE

*              *              *              *

Pre-Competition Month on Twitter

Although the contest began on August 4th, the contestants all wrote on the Fourth Fiction Twitter page over the month of July as a way of introducing themselves to each other and to the readers. I’ve compiled their tweets in the posts below. For a more detailed explanation about the Twitter posts click here.

VIDEO: Fourth Fiction launch

Contestants’ First Ten Days on Twitter

VIDEO: Pre-Contest Literary Dares

Roundup of the Ten Literary Dares

VIDEO: Pre-Contest Chain Story

The Chain Story

*              *              *              *

Polls

The readers voted off writers along the way. Click on the following links to see the poll results. The first poll was for the favorite writer during the pre-competition month on Twitter (the winner was exempted from the first round of elimination voting). In the final four polls, the readers voted for their favorite contestants. The contestant who received the least votes was eliminated.

Pre-Contest Vote for your Favorite Poll
1st Elimination Poll
2nd Elimination Poll
3rd Elimination Poll
4th Elimination Poll
5th Elimination Poll
6th Elimination Poll
7th Elimination Poll
8th Elimination Poll
9th Elimination Poll
10th Elimination Poll
11th (Final) Elimination Poll

www.youtube.com/watch?v=qZLDX9ATiF8

Grand mother always told me to look into my heart for answers when too much confusion come. She also told me man who give you his heart too quickly is either too stupid or too clever. Either way trouble for you. She was wise woman babushka.

While I look at memory key I notice businessman near by is staring over his newspaper. I push pieces of heart back together and put inside my blousa but he keep glancing over. I say to myself Don’t be crazy. Man is looking because its what man do. They look at woman.

I say this to myself but I begin to have paranoia because he keep looking down where necklace is. I think Don’t be stupid Ivana. Man is looking at your breast not heart. Its nothing new to you this.

Then I see other man glancing at me. And when airhostess walk by she have look of suspicion. Its true since I was teenager I sometimes have paranoia and make crazy imaginations but never so strong. I keep seeing eyes staring at me.

I feel too much dizzy so I go to toilet but old woman go inside before me. While waiting I feel like hole plane is watching me. Like they know I have secret. Like I commit horrible crime and they want for me to pay. I feel their gaze pressing into my back.

When old woman come out she make eyes narrow like I done something to her. But I don’t react. I know how to pretend like I’m calm. How to hide true feelings. Cabaret taught me this. To always wear body armour. Armour of laughter or coldness or flirting or whatever. Its why always I dream one day to be writer. Because fiction is only place for me to find freedom. To be my reality. Not to hide or disguise or pretend but to be Ivana. If you want fiction you look in reality but for the reality you look in fiction.

When babushka say Look into your heart Ivana she mean this. To discover what is your path and live by it. To live it even if it make life daily struggle. Because struggle is okay if it don’t kill you. And even if it kill you it’s not so bad. Could be better yes but at least you lived. More horrible to be dead while alive. Dead to true self.

Of course you have to know who your true self is. So much noise now in world its hard to know anymore. Easy to get confused. Like distraction. To mistake yourself for person your not. You can live hole life like this. Live wrong life by accident. Live stranger’s life without even knowing it.

Don’t tell to me ignorance is bliss. Ignorance is easy but not bliss. Bliss is to be aware. And bliss come with pain. Like thorns on rose to be little cheesy. Everything have price in life. This too cabaret teach you.

I lock bathroom door behind me and sit on toilet. Room is spinning. I’m about to swallow necklace when I remember x ray security machines. What if in America they make you do x ray going into country? And then they find out I have heart inside me. Better to wear my heart outside like I’ve been doing.

I feel sick. Like to vomit again. And fear to leave bathroom. Fear to face passengers. Suddenly there is knocking on door. I don’t say nothing. Then knocking louder. I open door and man is staring at me. Passengers also looking. When paranoia is not to strong you can say to yourself Silly mind don’t be crazy to me. But when it get to strong all you can hear is the crazy mind.

Its like torture for me now to have memory key but not to have computer. Somehow I know there is answer in USB. Answer to what I don’t know. There is times when you only realise what question you had after finding answer. Its like that. Anyone can find answer. Harder to find question. Like difference between following path in forest and to find path in first place.

I am not one to become afraid easily because I know to survive alone in strange country. But the feeling is something else. Like my hole life can collapse if someone take USB from me. Don’t ask me how I know but memory key is only thing now that matter. I almost laugh to think this. To think key to my memory is inside my heart which is on my chest. My poor little brain lost even its memory.

Little bit its true because I don’t even know who I am any more. Yesterday poor Ukrainian prostitute in Cyprus and today rich American widow wearing Louise Ferre and Swarovski flying first class to Washington. Never I liked people who say only obstacles in life are those inside you. Always people who never know real obstacles say things like this. This is why I can’t believe yet what is happening. This is why I need to get to computer.

Plane lands in Paris for transfer. I have only fifteen minutes until I have to bored flight to Washington so I rush around terminal looking for computer but find nothing. Then I see transit lounge. Two women are at front desk with bags open, searching for something and arguing. I don’t have time for waiting so instead ask man at desk if there is computer. He tell me lounge is for first class passenger. I show him my ticket which I realise is what other women are looking for and he scans it.

Suddenly he make big smile. Congratulation he say. We have special offer with Apple Computer to give away one free laptop per month to random person who walk in. Lucky day for you he say. Just sign here.

I make signature Ivana Braun and he give me box. The two women start to protest that I cut in front of them. They threaten to make revenge and sew him. These Americans with there sewing. He try to explain but they only get more angry. No point to argue so I walk into lounge. By the time I open packaging I hear call to bored aiplane so I leave. Two women still arguing with man.

To win free computer seem impossible but life is so crazy lately that why not believe? Its like I’ve fallen through hole of rabbit. Ivana in Wonder Land. Now with laptop I can answer all my problems on plane. I keep making expectation for someone to try steal necklace but no one does. But still on plane their all watching me. From far away. Like wolves. But also afraid to get to close to me.

Again no one sitting beside me in first class so I have hole two seats to myself.  Paranoia still there but to have computer give me courage so I fight against it. When people look at me, I just stare back until they look away. Like to say Nothing is out of ordinary here so look somewhere else. I wait until after dinner most of plane is asleep and lights are out and it feel like I’m alone. It’s half hour to midnight. I turn on laptop and put in USB memory key. At last I say to myself. At last time has come.

APHRODITE

It’s what name of folder is that pops up. Strange. Not what I expect. I click on it. Only one file inside called README. So I click on it to:

Instruction to Reader

1. Go to http://www.fourthnight.com/2009/12/fourth-fiction-complete-season
2. Make scrolling down until you find Round 1 Video – “Fire”. Click on Contestant 1 and write first word in that post.
3. Click on Contestant 2 and write second word in it.
4. Click on Contestant 3 and write third word… etc. Continue like this (including HOST!) for all Round 1 contestants.
5. Do what it is asked of you.

*CLICK HERE to read Part II of COCO 12, which is password-protected. The password is the last word of the sentence discovered above.